That’s the hard part. Where do you tell a story that you’re not sure how it began? I think the basics will do.

I’m 28 years old, currently married to the man of my dreams, former military, and trying to conquer my past while also giving other women, and men, a voice. I joined the military just shy of my 19th birthday. I graduated high school at 17, tried a bit of college, but I always knew I would end up in the military.

This is where it starts to get tricky. I found out the day I graduated basic training that someone I loved very dearly, like a second father, was slowly dying of terminal cancer. He knew I would have stayed, so everyone promised not to tell me. On the proudest day of my life, I was hit with the biggest bombshell I had ever faced.

Fast forward and I’m at my first duty station in central California. I grew up on the Florida Gulf shore and was now staring out at the Pacific. My tech school was a year a and half long, we were only permitted leave for Christmas and our class break, ours was the beginning of July 2007.

This is the beginning of my story. This is my turning point. I’m new to blogging (obviously I have a lot to learn, this page is so bleak). I’m also new to letting feelings out and sharing things I’ve kept hidden. Building walls and keeping people out are what I do best. That’s probably why I have such a hard time learning to cope with PTSD (non-combat) from what comes in the next chapters in my life.

Short and sweet into. The next bit in my life is a lot more complicated. Stay tuned for the next chapter.

Side note: Every entry will end with #23toomany. It stands for the 22 veterans and one active duty who commit suicide every day. It’s not a political statement, it’s my way of honoring my friends, brothers, and sisters. I love you and miss you all.

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